Part II
Rated: M

By: AW

Disclaimer: I don't own the people or the episodes but the story is mine.

Well it was almost noon. The last day she would have to stay in San Francisco. The ceremony was scheduled for 1 pm, and after that, they would all be set free until re-assignment.

Kathryn met up with Chakotay and Seven before the ceremony. "Well this is it then. Our last day as members of the Voyager crew."

Chakotay turned to Kathryn, "I'm sure your next crew will be just as dedicated and as devoted to you Kathryn." Kathryn playfully swatted Chakotay on the arm, "I can only hope for a new crew as good as this one was."

The glares that she was getting from Seven would have melted the ice on the Vulcan polar ice caps. "Captain, the Commander and I have some business that we need to attend to."

Janeway nodded and pointed towards the table that was designated for the Voyager senior staff. "I'll see you after the ceremony then Commander, Seven."

They both nodded and made their way to the table they were assigned. Janeway saw Tom and B'Elanna and made her way over towards them and little Miral. She hoped everything was okay with the new baby. "Hello Lieutenants."

Tom saw his former Captain and a smile lit up his face. "Well Captain, you did it. We're home. And what a good job you did of it too."

B'Elanna just laughed, "Oh come on Tom it wasn't all her doing, I had something to do with it too. Someone had to run the engine room."

Janeway smiled, "Do you mind if I sit with you?"

Tom turned to B'Elanna with a look that asked, *Do you know what's up?* B'Elanna just slightly shook her head. Tom tried to open up to the group, "So Captain, I thought you were going to sit at the head table with Commander Chakotay."

Janeway looked slightly dismayed, "No I gave up my seat to Seven, she wanted to sit with the Commander, it's been that way ever since they became an item." She looked down at her hands mournfully.

Tom piped up trying to break the awkward silence, "Looks like the ceremony is about to start." Kathryn turned to Tom about to make some comment about ceremonies and him probably being the next Admiral Paris, and she thought better of it. Tom saw her hesitation and knew she was about to say something, and decided against it. "Hey Kathryn, maybe you'll be the next vice-admiral," he smiled and Kathryn just looked away, loosing herself in the moment, in some thoughts of Chakotay and the future they could have had if only she has let him in a little earlier.

She looked back up into Tom's face, "I'm sorry what was it you were saying?"

"Nothing important, you looked a million miles away."

She sighed, "No only about 70,000 light years." And she left it at that. The Paris couple looked at each other than to her.

B'Elanna looked at her daughter in the carrier next to her. "I need to go and change her, I'll be right back." Tom nodded and Kathryn just looked passively on as if she had not even heard what they had said.

With B'Elanna gone to change Miral, it gave Tom an opening to talk to Kathryn. "So Captain, what's up with you? We had to take the baby back in and they checked her out one last time, something about hoping there were no nanoprobes from B'Elanna's mock assimilation in the baby's bloodstream. Weird they didn't pick that up before, or think of it. Unless someone else had the same problem and they had to make sure it wasn't the same case with Miral."

Kathryn awoke from her daze, more surprise showing on her face than she liked. "What did you say Tom?"

Tom looked at Kathryn an idea forming in his head. He was thinking maybe Seven was pregnant and having some problems, but could it be Captain Janeway? "I said...never mind. It wasn't really important."

Kathryn looked at Tom, she pulled him aside. "Come here Tom, let's go talk outside for a minute." She pulled him all the way outside to the grounds of Starfleet Academy. Away from prying eyes and listening ears.

She looked him in the eye and all Tom could think was this firey woman was the Kathryn Janeway they had all known and grown to love. "What I say to you now, you can't repeat Tom." She paused, "Well I know B'Elanna will hear it, but you guys have to keep this to yourselves. I haven't had a chance to talk to Chakotay yet, I know right now he's not too interested in me, but I also think it would hurt him if it didn't come straight from me."

She began to tell her tale. How she was pregnant, the possible problems with the nanoprobe technology still swimming inside of her. The fact that Jaffin was the father, and she had no way to tell him, or to even justify having an affair while in the Delta Quadrant. Her worries about what could be wrong with this child, about what will happen and if this child would just be a thing of study for Starfleet.

Finally her aversion to abortion and how she could not end an innocent life no matter what. "So Tom, now you know. Please keep this to yourself. I have no interest in overshadowing the crew's accomplishments, or being the center of attention at this time. As I said before, I haven't talked to Chakotay, I haven't told my mother, my sister...Oh god I can't do this."

Tom looked at her, Kathryn Janeway one of the strongest women he knew, and here she was breaking down right in front of him. He pulled her to a hug of comfort. A hug that said I will always be here for you, all you have to do is ask. "Captain...Kathryn, I'm sure B'Elanna and I can take you in for a few days, I'm sure you'd like to visit your goddaughter and your namesake."

Kathryn looked up surprised, her problems momentarily forgotten. She gave Tom a puzzled look.

Tom piped up. "Her name is Miral Kathryn Paris." Janeway had tears of joy running down her cheeks. If she could forget this for one day, it might make it all better.

"We'd better get back inside. They're probably ready to start the ceremony, and wondering where the hell we went." Tom laughed, "Yeah they might think I ran away with you and we had a wild passionate affair."

Kathryn smiled, "Unlikely, but I guess it’s possible."

They went inside and greeted the many Voyager people. Had the room ever filled up in the fifteen minutes while they were outside airing Kathryn's dirty laundry. Kathryn approached the table where B'Elanna and Miral were sitting. "Sorry B'Elanna, I needed to borrow your husband for a minute. I brought him back for the most part no worse for wear."

B'Elanna laughed, "I hope so Captain, I didn't want to have to blame you for a failed marriage and a broken home."

Kathryn excused herself and made her way over to the table where the couple of the hour sat: Commander Chakotay and Seven of Nine.

B'Elanna looked at Tom, "Is she okay?"

Tom shook his head not sure what to say, "I hope so B'Elanna." He paused, "I hope so."

Kathryn approached the table and Seven looked up to see the woman that was her competition, and always would be. "Captain." Janeway nodded, and approached Chakotay. "I am going to get a drink for myself and the Commander, would you like something?" Even though her words were nice, there was an acidity to her tone of voice.

"No, thank you Seven I'm fine."

Seven nodded and made her way to the drink stand. Chakotay moved over a seat and made room for his former Captain. "Kathryn, nice to see you again." He paused, "I need -"

"I - " Kathryn said at the same time. Kathryn nodded at him. "We need to talk. You free for coffee after the ceremony?"

Chakotay smiled, "I think I can manage to fit you into my schedule." He opened an imaginary planner, "I'm free after the ceremony and most of the night is clear."

Kathryn couldn't help but chuckle. "Alright then, how about four o'clock. The little coffee shop just across from the flight school."

Chakotay nodded, "You know Kathryn you don't have to leave so soon, you can sit with us."

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Seven scowling at her. "No, that's okay. I have a seat next to B'Elanna and Tom, I haven't really gotten the chance to spend much time with them, or get acquainted to Miral Kathryn."

Chakotay looked at Kathryn, "Well they made a good choice of a middle name, and godparents for that matter."

Kathryn smiled, "Who did they make godfather?"

Chakotay grinned back, "You're looking at him."

Kathryn laughed, how ironic life was in so many ways. She looked up just in time to see Seven ready to sit down. "Excuse me Captain. That is my seat."

Janeway looked at Chakotay and rolled her eyes. She watched him mouth the words, *We'll talk later.*.

Kathryn went to sit down, and the awards ceremony began. What also began was the most unexpected thing, well to Kathryn anyway; Janeway had been promoted. If only they knew.

She heard Admiral Paris' voice. "This is a bit impromptu, but it's the best we could do at such short notice, and we certainly didn't want to wait. Captain Janeway, please step forward." Kathryn did as she was told, hoping this wouldn't be a dressing down. "For your determination in getting your crew home despite almost impossible odds-and for beating the Borg at their own game-you are hereby promoted to admiral."

She looked away, did not want to look people in the eye. But she knew that a position as Admiral meant no more space travel, no ship of her own, and life as she had lived it, for the past almost fifty years was over. Kathryn went back to sit down at the table with Tom and B'Elanna. Slowly each ensign and lieutenant that deserved to be promoted made their way up to stand in a line before the Admiral. Both Lieutenants Paris and Torres became lieutenant-commanders. And Kim, Vorik and Campbell turned to face the applause as lieutenants. Kathryn, Admiral Janeway now, looked down at her hands. At least most of her crew that deserved promotions had gotten them.

Kathryn sat through a dinner banquet she had not enjoyed and simply tolerated the congratulations and the applause with a kindness and a smile she had learned over the years to produce on cue.

After the all too long banquet, about 2:30…Kathryn went to Indiana. It was time for some explaining, and she was in no mood to face the music alone.

The transporter took her away from the Starfleet politics, the promotions, a life she had lived for far too long. She had told her mother and her sister not to come to the banquet, she had told them that she would meet them directly afterwards at home. She saw her childhood home in the background, and began the walk, the walk that was her last one so problem free, for the rest of her life.

Kathryn approached the door and went to knock, just as the door opened and she was just about bowled over by her overanxious mother and sister. "All right, all right. Nothing overly special to see here, just me."

Phoebe pulled the jacket off of her sister. "Oh Kathryn, you look good, a little too skinny mind you...but you were always the twiggy one." Kathryn returned her sister's hug, it was good to be home. It all seemed surreal, they had been in the Delta Quadrant for seven years and they were finally home.

They entered her mother's home and went to sit down on the couch. Her mother piped up. "Kathryn, tell us all about it. Seven years was a long time to be alone. I hope you're happy Kathryn."

"Well it was a long strange trip, but I'm just so happy to be home."

Phoebe piped up, "The Captain that brought Voyager home."

Kathryn stopped her right there. "I didn't do it alone...I had a lot of help from everyone. And it’s no longer Captain, as of today you are speaking to Admiral Janeway."

Gretchen looked at her daughter, "Oh Kathryn, that is such good news. You won't be on the road for months at a time, maybe you'll finally have a chance to find a good man and give me the grandchildren I've wanted from you for so long." She winked playfully Kathryn's way.

Kathryn looked at her mother. "That's what we need to talk about mom."

Both Gretchen and Phoebe's jaws dropped. "Have you already made me a grandmother, possibly with that handsome first officer of yours?"

Kathryn shook her head, she wished. "No mom, that's not it at all." She paused, "I'm pregnant mom."

Gretchen took Kathryn in her arms, "Kathryn that's wonderful. Someone will take on the Janeway bloodline after all." Kathryn sighed, "Its half Borg mom. I don't know what to do. Her father is an alien from another quadrant that I got together with under mind control. It's not exactly the picture perfect way to bear a child."

Phoebe could see that her sister was distressed. "Kathryn, we'll love this child no matter what, and so will you. You know that." Phoebe embraced her sister in a hug that spoke volumes.

"Does anyone have any idea what time it is?"

Phoebe looked at the chronometer on the desk behind her. "Just about 1530 hours Kathryn, almost three thirty."

Kathryn did a double take. "I have to make my way back to San Francisco. I have to meet up with someone."

Gretchen moved up to Kathryn, "It wouldn't by any chance be that dashing first officer of yours would it?" Gretchen could have sworn Kathryn blushed but said nothing.

Kathryn looked at her mother. "Wouldn't you like to know. I see nothing has changed still trying to get your nose in my social life." Gretchen laughed, "Would I be your mother if I didn't?"

Kathryn looked at her, "No. But I'm still not telling you who I'm going to see."

With that final thought Kathryn left her mother's house and made her way to San Francisco to meet Chakotay and explain a few things.

Back in San Francisco.

Chakotay sat in the café with Seven. He had to end this, it just wasn't real enough. She had the emotional level of a teenager just learning about love and live. He couldn't deal with it. He was over 50 years old, too old to teach her the ways of the world. He wanted so many things in life, love, a family, a house to call his own. None of these things would happen with Seven. None of them.

He took Seven's hand. "Seven, I like you, and I respect you, but this isn't the type of relationship that can keep going on." He looked at the emotions as they ran through her mind. "We have to end this, before we get too close and the pain is just too much, and time is wasted. I can't wait any longer. I waited for Kathryn for years and she just didn't want to have anything to do with the notion of perhaps being perfect for me, and if I want all these things I described, I need to try to find it." He got up and kissed Seven on the forehead. "Thank you, for being there for me in the Delta Quadrant, and maybe for being my soul mate in a different life, but in this time, it's not meant to be." He walked out of the café and left Seven alone to ponder her life choices.

It was almost 1600, and he was off to see Kathryn. Maybe they could make one last go of it, or maybe not. Maybe they were just destined to be friends and nothing more. Or maybe she was destined to marry him and bear his children.

Or maybe they were meant to go their separate ways and part company for good.

Life was funny that way. He arrived at the small coffee house and saw Kathryn sitting there waiting for him, wearing her new uniform and dressed with the pips of an admiral. Kathryn always fleet, always working, never on break. He approached Kathryn, "I thought they gave the order for all Voyager crew to take the next month off."

Kathryn smiled, "So they did. I just don't have any other cloths."

Chakotay laughed, "So what was it that was so important that you had to see me right away?"

Kathryn opened her mouth to answer him and it all went black as she lost consciousness and the darkness enveloped her.

TBC In Confidence, Part III

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